Do you ever wonder why you keep making the same mistakes or struggling with the same negative thoughts repeatedly?
A few months ago, I relocated my TV to a less frequently used room and set a goal to stop watching movies altogether. While this helped me reduce my movie-watching habits, I eventually found myself binge-watching again.
I grew tired of repeating the same mistakes over and over again.
Today, I’d like to share my insights on why we make the same mistakes and how we can prevent them.
Here are some common repetitions:
- Continuously bringing up negative thoughts:
In my case, past experiences come up and create negative thoughts. I know that I can’t fix them and can’t do anything about it as they’re already gone but keep coming to my brain.
Tactic #1: I acknowledge that I am the one thinking about them again and creating negative thoughts.
I remind myself that I have the power to control my thoughts, and I am capable of stopping them. I repeatedly tell myself, “I won’t allow negative thoughts to enter, as I am the one who decides what I want to think.”
Tactic #2: I shift my focus to positive thoughts instead. For instance, missing out on a great property opportunity due to my stubbornness used to cause me anxiety. It would even keep me up at night. However, I’ve started telling myself, “I will find an even better property in a better location, and I’ve gained valuable lessons from this experience. Ultimately, I’ve swapped the negative thought for a positive one.
Changing thought patterns requires consistent practice because the brain is accustomed to old patterns. The strategy is to replace negative thoughts with positive ones and eliminate unhealthy thought patterns. - Engaging in binge-watching.
Despite moving the TV to a room that I rarely use, I found myself falling back into binge-watching. However, since implementing these tactics, my binge-watching habit has decreased by 95%.
Tactic #1: I avoid exhausting myself because when I’m overly tired, my brain leans towards easy and mindless activities like binge-watching. For instance, I have reduced my ice hockey practice from three hours to two hours and added an extra hour of practice on another day. This change leaves me feeling less tired and enables me to maintain other meaningful activities.
Tactic #2: I practice 5 to 10 minutes of meditation. Simply, I lie down in a comfortable position and focus solely on my breathing, clearing my mind of any thoughts. If I’m feeling particularly exhausted, I opt for a 30-minute nap instead. The crucial point is to reduce tiredness so that I have the energy to resist the temptation to binge-watch. Additionally, I engage in reading entertaining magazines or listening to podcasts as alternative activities. - Having recurring arguments with family member.
I used to frequently argue with my brother, which left me feeling down and regretful. However, since implementing these tactics, our conversations have become more peaceful, and our family bond has strengthened.
Tactic #1: I now strive to be more patient during conversations with my brother and practice active listening. For instance, he often likes to speak for 30 minutes to an hour without interruption. I actively listen without interrupting, and if the conversation extends beyond my comfort, I suggest continuing it another time rather than insisting on ending it abruptly. This approach shows him respect.
Tactic # 2: I’ve modified my tone to be less elevated, speaking in a calmer voice during conversations with my brother.
Tactic # 3: When my bother shares opinions that I disagree with, I encourage him to step into his own shoes and reconsider the issue from his perspective. For example, when he attempted to change my mother’s diet from being a meat lover to adopting a more vegetarian lifestyle, despite her reluctance, it led to numerous arguments between them. In response, I asked him to reflect on how he would feel if someone asked him to change one of his own habits, whether he would be happy to comply. Since then, he has shown more respect for my mother’s opinions.
Feel free to share any suggestions or ideas you may have by leaving a comment below.
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